My parents called me a worrywart when I was a kid. It might have had something to do with the fact they allowed me to watch the evening news with them. I was scared for my life! As I grew up, my fear expanded to include things like speaking up in class or making the wrong decisions about whether to hang at the Queens mall or the one on Long Island.
So it stands to reason that befriending the most badass girl in high school made me feel safer. She walked around in her little uniformed plaid skirt like she owned the place. The teachers seemed to almost believe it. This girl said and did whatever was on her mind. I loved hanging out with her and experiencing her fearless world.
Later in life, I learned that fear stands for False Evidence Appearing Real; or Forgetting Everything is All Right. I repeat these little mnemonic devices to myself anytime I sense fear getting in the way of my goals.
Sometimes our fears are rooted so deep, we don’t even recognize them for what they are. We might be afraid of getting close to someone because we don’t want to lose our freedom. Or we might be afraid to get the perfect job, because we are scared we won’t succeed.
Either way, our fears don’t protect us. They hold us back. It’s good to remember that fears are just figments of our imagination; part of our mind’s constant chatter (kvetch, in my case). It’s important to let the fear in, but equally as important to recognize it for what it is, meditate on it, and then move forward anyway. Like the Nike ad at the mall always said, JUST DO IT.
