If you’re like me, you need to live in a city with a pulse.

Unfortunately, that pulse too often comes at the cost of high blood
pressure. I’m sometimes overwhelmed by New York City’s seemingly
endless options of love, careers, and even Thai take out. Many of my
friends exist on a permanent adrenaline rush. They run around, make
connections, and check off to-do lists without any sense of
fulfillment. The harried “I’m on the go” look isn’t so cute, either.

We all want to be successful, but true success can’t happen without
inner peace and focus. Try out the following techniques to jump-start
some mental and emotional togetherness. If you master these
techniques, blissed-out energy flows are sure to reach you even through cemented sidewalks and stiletto heels.

1. Put You First
If you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be an ounce of good to
anyone else. In the big picture, therefore, it’s not selfish to put
yourself first: It’s mandatory. Fill your cup so it can spill over by
incorporating an hour of “You Time” every day. It doesn’t matter if
you spend that hour reading, writing, people-watching out the window
of a café, or getting a manicure. And try putting your own well-being
before your boss, partner or family member. Remember: When you’re
happy, they will be happier.

2. Start Your Day with Stillness
Sit still for a 10- to 20-minute meditation every day before leaving
your home. It sounds tougher to schedule than it is! When the dust
settles in your head, everything you do will seem clearer and smart
decisions will come more easily. I get a natural high after 20 minutes
of meditation that beats any martini or tag sale. Stillness tunes you
into who you really are—not who you think you are. If you absolutely
can’t sit still, throw on a soothin meditation CD or join a class to
lead you to silent mental bliss.

3. Go Inward
You can find satisfaction in things, places or activities for all of
three minutes before you find yourself chasing the next thing for
another fix. I used to run around thinking if I focused on certain
hobbies or went to the right events, I would be happier. Find that
high or satisfaction with yourself first: It’s more lasting and
genuine. Doing yoga and mediation helps me with this daily.

4. Check Your Community
We all have friends, but some may cause more chaos than peace in your
already-busy days. Make a list of the people in your life and
determine who drains your good vibes, and who adds to your well-being.
The saying “You are the company you keep” is right on. Cool it with
your unsupportive friends and those erring toward the dramatic. You’ll
see a major shift toward peace in the city.

5. Do One Thing at a Time
This might be the toughest task to tackle. Each morning, I force
myself to make a list of my three biggest goals. I work on each
individually throughout the day. The key is to be conscious and focus
on each goal separately before checking it off your list and moving
on.

6. Let Go
Get the “shoulds” out of your vocabulary and accept and love where you
are in life now. Fretting over how much harder you should be working,
or how much more you should be going out, or how long you should have
already been married is unproductive and damaging. Pressure, worry and
negativity only keep you stuck. Be patient and accepting of where you
are in life—you’re there for a reason, if not a lesson.

7.  Stop Complaining
Many city-goers are cynics who proudly complain about everything. It
may have been funny on Seinfeld, but it’s not so helpful in your life.
Whatever you pay attention to, grows. So if you’re bemoaning crowded
trains, a lack of dates, and an annoying boss, you’ll just get more
that in your life. Try putting together a “gratitude list” each
morning of 10 things you love about your life. E-mail it to friends,
or keep the list in a notebook. You’ll notice it grows quickly.

It’s not easy living in a city’s hussle-and-bustle; but don’t let that
dictate the world you live in. Relax and enjoy your time in the city.
It’s fast, fleeting, and worth every skip, hop and breathe.

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